Living fully or shut-down – the importance of FEELING yourself


Why do we seek help from psychologists and the like?

Because our feelings and how our lives “happen” are troubling us so much, we need help to resolve what’s causing us emotional pain. Because we can’t FEEL ourselves FULLY, SEE CLEARLY and find our way out.

Obviously, we can feel pain and confusion or the expression of it in our lives that don’t work out so well, but are we fully in touch with our NEEDS and our true SELF-EXPRESSION?

In our daily lives, we may not be aware of the fact that we are more or less disconnected from feeling ourselves. Some have tried to completely ignore feeling, most of us have strong filters within that CENSORS everything that bubbles up from the SUBCONSCIOUS parts of the mind.

At some point in time, this strategy of DISCONNECTING FROM FEELING, helped us survive and stay “in control”. Now, it mainly causes TROUBLE, to us, to people we meet, to the sustainability of a living Earth, as not being in touch with ourselves completely DISTORTS OUR REACTIONS and makes us move through life “blindly”.

This disconnection from feeling ourselves and living in full connection with our hearts and wiser selves causes serious diseases of the body-mind. We know that DEPRESSION and ANXIETY grows epidemically in our world. One major factor is our disconnection from fully feeling ourselves.

I’ve been there, and I still am (to a lesser degree I hope); not allowing certain feelings to come into my conscious mind. In fear of painful emotions, unable to hold and accept these feelings and thoughts in my conscious mind.

Yes, there are thoughts behind these feelings, the SELF-TALK we cannot hear as we’ve shut that conscious listening off. However, the subconscious part of the mind, and the BODY, is LISTENING and REACTING on the content of this self-talk. Hello depression/anxiety.

The feelings that we try hard not to feel, are like big air-filled beach balls that we desperately try to push back underneath the water. Control behaviors, eating disorders, workaholic-ness, alcoholism and other ADDICTIONS are PROCEDURES we turn to in order to DISTRACT US from feeling fully and seeing clearly. But these feelings will keep trying to emerge, and we get addictions and difficulties to run our lives, along with the difficult emotions and confusing thoughts.

When these previously repressed thoughts and emotions emerge, there’s the possibility to be grateful for the opportunity to finally deal with and dissolve these long-stored issues.

There’s a type of therapy called Intensive short-term dynamic psychotherapy (ISTDP) that holds the idea that the more you can feel, the faster you’ll heal. Feeling a lot and not being able to handle it doesn’t result in healing, but feeling a lot when the feelings are held space for by another person (a therapist for example) and/or by yourself, to a degree you can handle; that’s where the healing can happen.

So, how is this healing happening really?

I’ll speak from my experience of how this HEALING happens through YOGA ASANA (physical poses).

ALLOWING emotions to be felt in the body and SHINING THE LIGHT OF AWARENESS on these sensations and connected thoughts, are how we can dissolve these issues. It will take time and practice, GRADUALLY learning to feel more fully, gradually letting it in, gradually becoming more aware.

My HEALING journey into more connection within has been mainly through the practice of yoga asana and through CONSCIOUS CONNECTION to other people. In yogasana, seen from a tantric viewpoint, we seek to turn every stone of our body-mind in order to come into contact with unresolved parts of ourselves and get the opportunity to heal, to UNTANGLE THE KNOTS, release the painful memories, dissolve stuck energies.

Through yoga, I’ve learned to HOLD SPACE for myself and my feelings. Learning to hold space for myself also helps me hold space for others, allowing them to be more of what they are as I’m letting myself be more of who I am.

Welcoming and allowing all of us to move into our pure, full and divine self-expression. We’re all on this journey together, whether your mind likes it or not. I’m still learning and growing and I invite you to join me.

 

 

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